And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
