the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
