my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
