Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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