Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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