All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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