Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize