The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
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