i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
