The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize