I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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