There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
