goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
