some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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