That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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