do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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