I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
What a dumb baby whore.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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