I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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