Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
