Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize