I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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