So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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