I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
