I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
