that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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