Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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