he referred to my room as the tit cave...
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
