i just google imaged poop.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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