last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I have already put on my inside pants.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
