Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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