have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize