I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Moan for me like Helen Keller
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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