Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
We need to get me chipped asap
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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