Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
