Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
