dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
