I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize