After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
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