Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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