At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
