I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
