tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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