school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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