people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
