you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
