me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
