just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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