shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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