I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
