just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
