Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
